Trapped
by ticktockjohnlock
Summary: New Moon alternative ending. After her cliff diving episode, Bella falls into a coma; able to hear everything around her, but unable to react. Collaboration with Glitterb1234.
1. Prologue

She convulsed violently, her chest arcing from the ground with the power of the tremors running through her. I knelt silently beside her, blistering heat running through me despite the pouring rain, shadowing her screwed eyes with my palm as she writhed on the sand. _Any minute now_, I thought.

I'd dragged her further along shore and she hadn't moved for what felt like hours, so at the sudden jerk of her body in the corner of my eye I charged over, heart pumping. I glanced at my phone.

_What?_

Panic-stricken adrenalin filled my head until all I could hear was the grind of my heart smashing into my lungs. I swallowed hard. Scooping her from the sandy bed I scampered desperately up the beach, sand gripping my sodden calves as I hurtled through the clearing, passing the deserted parking lot in a blur of trepidation. Buildings, cars and bystanders slurred by, but I couldn't tear my glazed eyes away from her thrashing body, splaying her damp hair wildly over my arm. She looked so weak and vulnerable that I wanted to eternally wrap my arms around her frail form.

_Nearly there, Bells. _The familiar scent of disinfectant wafted towards me and I raced to the reception desk, inaudible words dribbling from my mouth. The woman glared wide-eyed at Bella's thrusting torso and started waving her manicured hands at people, twirling frantically in her chair as a doctor finally stormed towards us. I held her body towards him and, with military ordering, rounded up some other medical staff who all barked confusing orders towards him.

We were pushed towards a vacant room with white furnishings and what seemed like hundreds of nurses grabbed Bella from my frozen arms, forcing her into the metal bed. I watched helplessly as they wired her up to a large machine, plugging multi-coloured fluids and tubes into her damp skin. The doctor pulled me aside, closing the door as I caught my final glimpse of her. He barked questions at me, twisting his voice into a generic tone meant to sooth my anxiety and calm my frantic rambles. My words tripped over each other, fraught to release their burden from my aching memory. My voice started to break halfway through the account and I turned to face the door, attempting to hide my tears as they dripped down my neck. The Doc patted my shoulder, whispering useless apologies and 'logical' reasons for my emotional outburst. I sank to the floor with shame, embarrassed by my unavoidable thoughts.

_Bloodsucker. Help._


	2. Chapter 1: Coma

Chapter 1: Coma

Alice POV

I stared out of the window at the barren Alaskan landscape. My heightened vampire senses allowed me to see every leaf and twig in the trees, every snowflake swirling through the air. I could hear the wind howling against the house, even through thick walls and closed windows. I could feel every thread in my clothes as I wrapped my arms around myself.

Seven months.

That was how long it had been since we were in Forks, since I last saw my best friend; since any of us had seen Edward. Since we were all happy and together, and everything was right with the world. Now, I felt like my world had crumbled and cracked. It hadn't toppled yet; that could never happen while I still had Jasper. But our whole family had been affected by Edward's decision. Even Rosalie, cold and unfeeling as she was towards Bella, admitted that life just wasn't the same without her. Smiles were few and far between around here.

Perhaps it was because I was thinking of her, or maybe it was just coincidence, but at that exact moment a vision hit me with so much force, I stumbled backwards and collapsed on the bed behind me.

Bella stood on top of an unfamiliar cliff top. Waves churned below her, and wind whipped her hair around wildly, blowing rain in her face. She closed her eyes, smiled, then stood still for a few moments, as if waiting for something. Then, her arms rose above her head, as if she were about to dive.

Though I knew it would do no good, I shook my head violently and whispered, "No!"

But the vision continued. Instead of diving, Bella seemed to step into the air, plummeting downwards. A shrill scream burst from her, before she disappeared below the waves. I clung to the pictures, not allowing them to slip away as they wanted to. I waited... and waited... but nothing happened. She didn't surface. She didn't wash up on the beach nearby. Nothing.

The vision faded, and I realised I was shaking and sobbing, a dry pricking in my eyes. Despair unlike any I had ever felt gripped me, tightening around my heart.

Of course, that got Jasper's attention. He appeared as if by magic at the door of the room we were sharing in Tanya's house.

"Alice?" he asked, frantic. "Sweetheart, what is it?"

I couldn't speak yet; I just shook my head.

He sat down beside me and took my hands in his. "What did you see?"

I could feel him trying to calm me, and his touch helped, but the anxiety was too strong to be crushed completely. I could only choke out a weak cry of "Bella," before I crumbled against his chest and began to sob again.

Why would she do something like this? Was she really so unhappy? Despite Edward's request that I not look for Bella's future, I couldn't control the random flashes I saw every now and then; I was so attuned to her after our time together, they just happened. What I saw always crippled me. I saw her crying and screaming in her sleep; sat alone at lunch, not speaking, ostracised by her other friends; in class, the seat beside her that Edward had occupied still empty; going about her daily routine like a zombie; Charlie getting more and more worried every day.

How could she? Didn't she even think about Charlie, what this would do to him? I had a sudden urge to help the poor man, to go back to Forks and do what I could for him. I pushed out of Jasper's arms and ran to the closet. Pulling down a big hold-all off the shelf, I began putting my clothes inside, one by one, moving much faster than a human would have been able to see. Even in my rush, I felt when Jasper followed me. His own worry permeated the air, rolling off him in waves. I could tell it was unintentional; he didn't know what on earth I was doing, and that put him on edge. But this only added to my frenzy.

"What about Bella? Alice, are you going back to Forks?"

How well he knew me; how quickly he guessed what I was up to. I placed the last of my clothes in my bag. "Yes, I'm going back. I have to."

I darted past him, out of the bedroom, and he followed me again. Down the stairs, to the living room, where Rosalie was sat on the sofa reading a magazine. She looked up as we entered, frowning. She had obviously heard our conversation.

"Alice, you can't. Edward said-"

I cut her off, abruptly furious. "I don't care what Edward said! Bella's in trouble!"

Jasper stepped back, alarmed by my anger. "Ali, darlin', just think about this for a minute. We can't just-" He trailed off as my expression turned murderous.

"You're asking me to wait?" I shrieked, hurting my own ears and making both of them flinch. "I just saw my best friend throw herself off a cliff and you're asking me to WAIT?"

They sat there staring at me stunned by my outburst. I took a deep breath, calming myself before I continued.

"The vision came out of nowhere; she probably made a snap decision to do it. It's too late to save her, but I can still do something for Charlie; I can't just sit here."

I turned for the door, and Jasper grabbed my hand. I looked up into his anguished eyes.

"Call me when you get there?" he pleaded.

I smiled. "Of course."

"You're just letting her go?" Rose spluttered.

Jasper turned to her. "When has she ever listened to me? Besides, she's right. You know how much Charlie relied on Bella. He's going to need someone there to help him out."

He bent his face to mine and pressed a soft kiss on my lips. "I love you." he whispered.

"I love you too." I replied with a smile, before turning and hurrying to the garage. Hopefully Carlisle wouldn't miss his Mercedes for a day or two.

The lights were on and the cruiser sat in the driveway when I pulled up to the Swans' house around seven the next evening. To my surprise, Bella's rusty old truck was there too, forcing me to park across the street and dash through the pouring rain to the door.

As I knocked and waited for Charlie to let me in, I thought over what I planned to say. I had to be very careful to act surprised when he told me, but more importantly, I had to act like I wasn't dying inside from the loss of my best friend.

The door opened revealing a haggard looking Charlie. He really did look terrible; his hair was a mess, he had bags under his eyes that reached all the way to his cheek bones, and he looked – and smelled - like he hadn't changed his clothes, let alone showered, in days. His eyes had a dead look in them, as if he couldn't take the prospect of a visitor on top of everything else. They widened when he saw me, and his jaw dropped.

"Alice?"

"Hi Charlie," I smiled, trying to sound like my usual chirpy self. "How are you?"

He gawked at me for half a second before he composed himself. "What... what are you doing here?"

"Well, since it's spring break, I thought I'd come by and see you guys. I'm really sorry we haven't been in touch. There was a ton of craziness getting everything set up in L.A., and we've only just started to get it fixed." I forced another smile. "Do you mind if I come in? It's a little cold out here."

Charlie blinked twice, then took a step back, opening the door a little wider to allow me inside.

"Sure Alice. You know you're always welcome here."

I breezed as lightly as I could manage into the living room, putting my purse onto the coffee table. Then, I braced myself to ask the question that would set everything off.

"So, where's Bella?"

I felt horrible as soon as I said it. Charlie's face fell even further and he collapsed into the armchair across from me. He put his head in his hands, and his shoulders began to shake.

I didn't speak; I couldn't. I waited.

"Alice," he finally choked out, "Bella... had an accident. She was swimming with some friends down at La Push and..." He stopped, swallowing thickly.

I moved across the room, kneeling by his elbow and gently rubbing his back. "It will be easier if you say it fast."

He looked up at me with tear filled eyes. "She's in the hospital. Jacob Black took her up there. He said the currents got the best of her suddenly, and he thinks she hit her head."

I was genuinely shocked. This wasn't the news I was expecting. Charlie was still speaking.

"That was two days ago, and she still hasn't woken up. She's stable, but the doctor says it doesn't look good. He doesn't know how long she'll last."

He broke down then, sobbing uncontrollably into his hands. I was frozen, relief and horror fighting to be the most prominent feeling in me. Bella wasn't dead. My vision was wrong. But she was still in grave danger, and there was the chance that she wouldn't make it.

My mind spun in a dizzy whirl. _I don't know what's going to happen. I can't see. Why can't I see? What do I tell the others? Why was I __wrong? Is anything what I think it is any more? _I had always relied absolutely on my visions; we all had. I trusted them to be right, to always reach their conclusion. Never, in all the decades since I first awoke to this life, had a vision been wrong. Sure, things had changed. I had wrongly interpreted what I saw on several occasions, but never this drastically.

Alice Cullen doesn't make mistakes.

My head was a mess of contradiction, confusion and uncertainty. However, there were two things I did know with absolute certainty. I had to see Bella... and I had to contact Edward, before someone else did.

One lingering doubt nagged at me through all this.

What if I was always wrong?


	3. Chapter 2: Alone

Chapter 2: Alone

**Bella POV**

Water flooded down my throat, choking and burning. The iron bar seemed to be dragging me, pulling me away from Edward, deeper into the dark ocean floor.

My eyes are searching; searching for the exit, the escape button, the switch. They won't open, but it's like they can't close. Something is throbbing, but it's not a real pain, just a strange feeling. I can't find it, though; I can't make out where it is. Maybe I'm dreaming, I'll wake up and nothing will be the same as here, it will be all right again, how it's meant to be.

**Patient POV**

"Her vitals are improving, but we're still uncertain. The scans are inconclusive, so we're going to run a few more tests today, take some samples. With any luck we'll have news by Friday."

"I hope so. Thanks doc, I really appreciate it."

The man's voice broke, whimpering as the doctor reassured him.

"Don't worry, Charlie, we'll save her." The doctor cooed.

There were light footsteps prancing into the room, I looked up, hopeful that George had brought my tea back from the cafeteria. Such a simple gesture seemed confusing to him, I doubt he'll be back by three. It was a slender girl, her dark hair bouncing with each gentle step as she danced over to the doctor.

"Don't worry, Charlie, she'll be fine." The girl said, rubbing the old man's shoulder.

He shrugged her off and left the room in a trail of mumbles.

She always had visitors, the girl next to me, it was a real shame she wasn't awake to see them. I could imagine her surprise, smiling and laughing at all the balloons, tearing the gifts open. Tears brimming from her, her, I wonder what colour her eyes are. Perhaps I'll never find out.

"Mag, what're you thinking of now?" George asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

"Oh, nothing George," I sighed as he handed me the polystyrene cup.

He rolled his eyes, silently pushed his glasses up his nose and stared blankly at his watch.

"C'mon Maggie, I'm not stupid. She'll come at five, be on her way here, no doubt."

"For goodness sake George, she's _always _'on her way.' Don't try and fool me - she isn't coming, not now, not ever." I huffed, taking a large gulp from my steaming coffee.

He shrugged and sat at the end of the bed, patting my leg.

**Bella POV**

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh Bella, I'm so sorry," Alice whimpered, breathing deeply in my ear. She'd been panicking, talking through her plan as she marched up and down.

"Bella, can you hear me? I'm so sorry! Why did I leave you?"

It was Edward speaking - he was apologizing to me; smiling, he had peonies in one hand- I could smell the fresh blossom -his other arm outstretched, cupping my cheek. I blinked rapidly, grinned, and searched the room to meet his worried expression. He beamed and we passionately embraced, tears flooding, until we could not identify where my tears started and his finished. He held my face and started laughing hysterically until he was trembling with delight, face crinkling immaculately. "I thought I had lost you, forever" he whispered, placing tender kisses that covered my moist face.

"Wake up, Bella, please, Bella, just wake up!" Alice cried, dragging me from my dream. She was dialling, jabbing numbers swiftly into the keypad. Her voice was quivering as someone answered.

"Rose, get Edward! Just get him! He needs to come here - you all need to," Alice continued as Rosalie replied with what seemed like an essay between each word.

"It's important! Yes, of course it's about her! What do you mean Rose? Ugh, I'm at the hospital, look, just get Edward! Yes, now!"

Edward? He's coming? Oh, Alice! He's really coming back? What about Jake – he'll come too won't he? Maybe I was asleep and didn't hear him, yeah; Alice probably just scared him off. He'll come back, I'm sure, and he can't just leave me here. Alone.

Frustrating, that's how it feels. I wish I'd just wake up, get this over and done with. Forget this ever happened. I was so stupid, so naive. It was only a voice, just an imaginary hallucination, a fake. Still, it was better than nothing. Better than anything, than this. Maybe this is what it feels like to be dead. People will forget about me soon, they won't bother to visit, they won't care about me. I'll be alone for the rest of my life, hearing patients leave as the doctors wait. They'll get tired of waiting for me to wake up; they'll get tired of putting their lives on hold. They'll return to normal and just get on with their lives. Well, it's no use, not like they can hear me in here - and if they could, I doubt they can speak crazy.

**Jacob POV**

"You look so peaceful, Bells. Ugh, I feel so dumb, talking to you like this. Just wake up, for _me_, Bella? Can you hear me?" I whispered, leaning onto her hospital bed.

I stroked her face with the palm of my hand, hoping the heat will bring her back to me. Then the idea just appeared out of the blue, why didn't I try this earlier?

"Okay, Bella, I know you'll probably hate me for this but then again, if it brings you back then, hey – why not!" I leaned over her and held her head in my sweating hands. She was so pretty even with the mess of tubes sliding into her. I checked the heart rate monitor - phew, still alive. I leaned into her so the tips of our noses were touching, and then slid down to place her plump lips onto my moist mouth. She's gonna kill me. I checked the heart rate monitor again.

"Damn, no change." I sighed, still hugging Bells to me.

"LEAVE THAT GIRL ALONE!" There was a booming yell followed with a heavy object smacking into my back as I rolled from the bed onto the cold floor. The room seemed to double in size as a short woman in a hospital gown started beating me with a pot plant until I could only hear her as a faint cry.

"_GEORGE! GET IN HERE!"_


	4. Chapter 3: Dreams

Chapter 3: Dreams

**Bella POV**

I drift in and out of awareness, almost like sleep and wakefulness. Though how you can be awake with your eyes closed I don't know. Whenever I can, I try to move, try to make my body obey me, but it won't listen. _Just one finger,_ I plead, but nothing happens. It's always the same, every time I 'wake up'. The only thing that changes are the people; the voices I hear talking.

Sometimes it's the doctor.

"She's still stable, but I don't like the look of these figures."

Or it might be Charlie.

"Come on Bells, you can do this. You can fight this. Just wake up. Please, don't leave me like this, you can't..."

Yesterday, it was Jacob.

"I'm so sorry Bella. If only I'd been there sooner. You wouldn't be like this. You'd be ok. Stupid red-headed bloodsucker, she ruined everything."

But, most of the time, the first voice I hear is Alice. I don't know if she leaves, or if she can tell that I can hear her, but she always seems to start talking just when I come part way back to reality. She's never halfway through a sentence or just finished and saying goodbye, like Charlie sometimes is. And she always starts the same way.

"He's on his way Bella. He'll be here soon."

That's the only thing keeping me going; the knowledge that Edward will be here soon. I don't even care that he's probably only coming to help Alice. I can almost make myself believe that he's coming because he cares about me.

I don't know how long I've been here. I don't know if it's day or night. There's no lightening of my eyelids. Just the bright light high above me, where all the voices come from. I can't be sure, but I think they're getting fainter. That scares me. I don't want them to fade away; I don't want to lose touch with life and slip away.

That's just when I'm 'awake' though. When I sleep, I dream.

One of the only positives of the accident: I think those rocks knocked my nightmares clean out of my head. There's no more wandering aimlessly through forests, looking for something that isn't there.

My dreams are happy now. I remember all the happy times in my life; the cookies Renee and I tried to bake when I was seven that somehow ended up on the ceiling; the time Charlie fished me a little crab out of one of the tide pools; my last summer in California before I moved to Forks, Renee laughing with Phil, Charlie smiling despite himself, his arm around my shoulder as we walk along the beach. Then, more recent; the first time I ever talked to Edward; visiting the meadow, his skin sparkling in the sunshine; spending time at his family's house; his voice when he saved me from James; the whole gloriously rainy summer before senior year; my birthday, minus the whole near-death experience thing.

Other times, my dreams are entirely fictional. I dream of Edward, of course. I dream that he is back, and I am awake. I dream of him telling me everything he said was wrong, that he made a mistake, that he loves me and he wants me. All these impossible things that will never really happen.

Then, one day, I wake up, and there is no noise. No voices at least. Not even a rustling of sheets from the bed next to me. I know there was a woman there; Maggie, her husband called her. Maybe she's asleep, or she went home. I hope she's alright. But she's not here now, and the only sound is the beeping of my heart monitor, the hissing sound of the oxygen pump that keeps me breathing, and the gentle whir of the machine monitoring my brain activity as it prints out an endless stream of results.

Can it be that I'm alone, for once? Maybe I should be relieved; peace and quiet, at last. But I'm not. I want someone here, I want to hear a voice... I don't want to be alone.

Then I hear it. It's very quiet, almost silent, nearly drowned out by the sounds of the machines, but I still hear. Even, gentle breathing. The only kind of breathing that comes from someone who doesn't need it. It's so familiar, and I instantly know why. I fell asleep to the sound of it who knows how many times over the summer.

Edward is here.

Now that I know this, I wonder how I didn't realise it before. I can feel his presence, almost see him sitting beside me... but I can't actually see. My view is still only that white light. It doesn't seem so far away, and the sounds around me are clearer. Hope springs up in me before I can stop it, and I decide to take advantage of my enhanced sensitivity. I listen intently to the world around me. I will him to speak.

"Bella."

It's a broken whisper, barely more than a breath, but just the sound of his voice sends a thrill through me. All of a sudden, the pain is all gone. I don't care that I can't move, because I want to stay right here. The hole in my chest is all closed up, like it was never there in the first place. I feel perfect.

He's still speaking. His breathing is less even; it hitches and shifts, like he's holding back sobs.

"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry. So, so sorry. For this, for everything. You have no idea. You probably can't even hear me. God, I'm so stupid."

He lapses into silence and, for once, I wish he could read my mind. Or, if not, that I could speak. I wouldn't mind being paralysed if I could just talk. But I can't. Still, I think what I would say, if I could.

_You're not stupid! You're the smartest, sweetest, kindest person I've ever met in my life. I can hear every word you say, and I want... no, I _need _you to talk to me. Tell me what you're sorry for, not that it matters; I will always forgive you. Tell me what you've been doing. Tell me why you came back. Tell me anything! Just keep talking, please._

I wonder if he can hear me, because he seems to be responding to my silent pleas.

"Bella... you probably don't want to hear this. You'll probably think it's all just bad excuses and lies. Why wouldn't you? I've lied before. But I have to tell you, whether you hear me or not; my conscience won't let me rest until I say it." Edward takes a deep breath. I wait.

"That day in the forest... I lied Bella. Every word I said was a lie. My kind do not experience change often, and when we do, it is permanent and complete. _You _changed me Bella. After almost 90 years of not knowing I was missing anything, you brought me to life. I could never stop loving you, even if I wanted to; and believe me, I don't."

I can't believe what I'm hearing. Is he saying what I think he's saying? Could he possibly still care about me? Still love me? My mind is spinning, so I only just hear him as he speaks again.

"When Alice called... I thought something horrible had happened. That there was a problem with my family. I never imagined there could be anything worse than that. But this is... so much worse. No matter how my heart is calmed to see your face and smell your scent and hear your heartbeat, it's not the same. I can't see your beautiful eyes, or hear your delicious laugh, or take you in my arms and hold on tight. If I never have the chance to do that again..." His voice chokes off abruptly, and I ache to comfort him.

"I mustn't think that way. Alice told me not to, and she'll have my head if she realises I have. But she can't see anything, and it's driving both of us crazy. Whether you can forgive me or not, even if you never want to see me ever again, I _need_ you to be ok. Not knowing if you're going to make it... it's killing me Bella. I haven't felt this scared since I thought I'd lost you to James."

I mentally shudder at the memory. I remember every time I thought I wouldn't see Edward again. The time with james, of course, in the ballet studio in Phoenix... the disastrous day he left me... when laurent nearly got me in the meadow, before Jacob and the rest of the pack showed up...

I wonder if it is as bad for me as it is for him, or if it's worse. Maybe it's me who has the worst experience; I'm never sure if I am enough to hold him. Maybe he's just guilty now, and he'll leave again when I wake up.

_If you wake up, _that annoying, self-doubting voice in my head mocks me. She has a point, much as I hate to admit it. The doctors think I don't hear them, don't see a change in the readings they get when I am 'awake', so they don't hide anything. As long as Charlie isn't around, they say whatever they want. I've heard them talk about declining vitals, decreasing levels of brain activity, new medication, different fluids in my IV. I tend to shut down a little, when I can. I can't seem to control when I drift off. I can't sleep when I want to, and when I want to stay awake, the blackness pulls me under.

Like now.

Edward isn't talking any more, just sobbing and whispering my name every now and then, and my subconscious has decided to shut down for the foreseeable future. As I am dragged further into the darkness, and that white light of reality fades away no matter how hard I try to cling to it, I have only one thought.

_Edward. Don't leave. Be hear when I wake up again._

Nothing else matters, as long as he stays. Nothing in the world.


	5. Chapter 4: Regret

Chapter 4: Regret

**Bella POV**

I wish I knew the date. Normally, I would wake up to hear Charlie watching the sport, his feet resting on my bed, leaning back in the chair as it creaks under the weight. He'd flick through the channels in the breaks, chewing the cold remains of the pizza he'd bought, as I listened, waiting as he paused between the news channels during the breaks.

It was an irritating routine of his back home, eventually I'd take the remote when it was on the reports near Forks, turn the volume up and go back to the kitchen and continue with dinner. I never saw the point in listening to other news reports, until I met the Cullens. Sometimes, when Charlie was out fishing, I would flick through until I found the US News and wait. My ears would prick at the sound of 'suspicious circumstances' and I would dart through to see the location. It was a habit I'd picked up with them; Carlisle checked the local murders and deaths each day, making sure everything was ordinary; human.

After _he… _they left, I carried on listening, widening my search to the East coast, Mexico and even Canada. I tried to kid myself it was for the right reasons – identifying the abnormalities in abductions, checking for unusual deaths, but I always knew why I kept looking. After they left it was my only connection to them, to _him._ I had a piece of their existence, something to remind me of them, to tell me that they're still out there and that they were, hopefully, watching out for me in Forks. My guardian angels...

However, today was the exception – apart from a woman, who had vacuumed the floor, mumbling about some soil near my bed, I was alone. Maggie had left on Wednesday, packed up and went as soon as the doctors let her go, so the bed next to me was bare. I had become accustomed to hearing the rustle of events behind the curtain, listening to her soft voice as she talked to George about their daughter. She was about my age, Maggie had told Edward, and we should be good friends when I wake up - if I wake up, he'd corrected.

From the uncertainty in his voice, you'd think I was already dead.

**Jacob POV**

It's so hard to get rid of them, when they're in your head all the time. They're chasing me now, but I can't face them yet. I shouldn't have let my guard down – two weeks of selective thoughts and I slip up tonight. I wish they'd just let it go, it was a mistake and I of all people know that it should never have happened.

_Jake! How could you be so stupid? _Sam calls.

_Yeah, seriously dude, Bella?_ Jared questions.

_Damn, Jake, she's in a coma!_ Embry yells.

I think of all the machines and wires, the charts, the disinfectant. It's still hard to picture Bells in the centre of it, looking so pale and fragile. What was I thinking?

_At least she was unconscious. _Paul and Jared laugh.

_What were you thinking, Jake? _Embry asks accusingly. I can almost feel their eyes boring into me, judging me for that stupid mistake.

_I, I can explain._ I say, skidding in the dirt.

_You wanted to be prince charming, Jake?_ Paul sniggers.

_Yeah, the magic kiss wakes your princess?_ Jared adds, laughing.

_Dude, isn't she the bloodsucker's girl?_ Embry says.

_Hey, you've basically kissed that bloodsucker! _Paul shouts, his laugh echoing in the trees.

Jared pictures me and that _thing_ and I skid to a halt, glaring menacingly at Paul.

_Shut_ up_ Paul! You've got no idea!_ I turn to him, shaking with fury.

_It didn't change, did it Jake? Your fairytale ending's failed, hasn't it? _Jared snorts.

_Leave him. _Sam says.

_I wouldn't want to stay with that _thing _anyway. _Jared spits.

_Yeah, it's disgusting. _Paul declares, glaring at me.

_You better have a good explanation for this Jacob._ Sam commands, turning around.

The others follow Sam as I watch helplessly, torn between following. Embry's last glance on the horizon almost makes me burst into tears. Almost...

**Edward POV**

_He hasn't left your side, has barely touched his food, bless him_. I meet her teary gaze as her eyes search my face and she sighs, returning her stare to her silent daughter. I clench my mouth in envy as tears drip from her moist cheeks. It does not take many visitors to remind me that I cannot cry. I continue scrutinizing the chart in my hands as Renee wipes her sodden cheeks with the back of her sleeve.

I've still got your hand, honey, do you know? She pleads desperately. I've been waiting for you to squeeze it back, to show me you're still there, that you're listening to me.

She coughs, as if to speak, but her mouth runs dry and words are replaced with trembling breaths caught in her throat.

'Sorry' she mouths, stumbling from the room to embrace Phil, leaning awkwardly at the doorway. I clench my mouth, throat blazing as their intoxicating scents combine delectably on my tongue.

"Make sure he eats something," Renee mumbles, head resting on Phil's shoulder as Alice glides through the room. I gesture towards the chart as she perches on the bed, studying my face. I hear Phil shuffle with Renee into the corridor and inhale deeply.

"You can't stay with her fore-" Alice begins. I interrupt by throwing the chart at her.

"There is a confusing decrease in her vitals with no logical explanation."

"She's been on new medication recently," Alice smiles encouragingly. "Only Bella could manage to baffle the doctors in her sleep." She'll wake up soon, Edward.

But of course, she is not asleep, for in her sweet slumber the soft call of her voice would break through the sheets. Through these countless nights, the stillness of her dreaming still slashes at my bleeding mind. I want to join you; my darling, I will follow you into the darkness. You will not be alone.


	6. Chapter 5: Fighting

Chapter 5: Fighting

**Bella POV**

I can feel the tension in the room when I awake about a week after Edward's return. At first I can't figure out what's wrong. Then the voices begin.

"What are you doing here?"

That's Edward.

"What are _you_ doing here?"

Jake. Oh God, this can _not_ end well.

"I love her."

"So why did you leave?"

"To protect her."

Silence. I wish I could see them. I'm worried that they're going to do something stupid, like start fighting in the middle of the hospital. Everything Jacob told me about werewolves and vampires being natural enemies floods my mind. I have to struggle to put aside my panic so I can listen to them. Jake speaks next.

"That makes no sense." He sounds frustrated. "If you want to protect her, wouldn't you be more useful here?"

Edward sighs. "It's not other people I want to protect her from. Well, it is, but they are people who are drawn to her because of me. I've put her in danger over and over, just by being in the same room. My brother nearly killed her on her birthday; that's what prompted our move. She's in too much danger around us. She's not safe. I just want her to be safe, and human, and happy..." He trails off.

Jacob scoffs lightly. "Two out of three. Too bad you didn't manage the last one."

Another pause. "You think she is happy with you." It's not a question; it's a statement of fact. Because of course, Edward knows Jacob's thoughts better than he knows them himself.

"Jesus, how did that not drive her insane? Just because you hear people's thoughts, you think you know everything!"

Edward scoffs. "I don't know everything. Far from it. And I can't hear Bella. I don't know why; I've just never been able to."

"Huh." is all Jacob says in reply. They are silent for a long time. I focus in on my surroundings, tying to figure out where they are. Something cold grips the fingers of my right hand, so Edward must be near. I think I feel more warmth on my left side, near where the door is, where the doctors voices always come from. Perhaps Jacob is standing by the door, or leaning against the wall. Yes, that must be it. Jake against the wall, by the door, arms crossed in front of him, and Edward sat in a little plastic chair at my side, holding my hand. I can see it clearly in my head.

Suddenly, there is a loud clatter as the chair falls to the floor. The cool pressure of Edward's hand vanishes.

"You did what?" he growls. I panic. What did Jacob do? What did he think of that has made Edward so angry.

"I just wanted to see if it would work. Everything is so much like a fairy tale nowadays, I figured it couldn't hurt." Jacob replies, nonchalant as always.  
"You _kissed _her!" Edward very nearly shouts.

He did _WHAT! _I don't remember that! Why would Jake think that kissing me would help? And what does her mean about fairy tales? The answer comes as I form the question. Sleeping Beauty; the princess in a deep slumber, woken by true love's kiss.

Jacob is either completely dumb or a very poor judge of body language. Or perhaps he's just deluded himself into thinking there was something between us. Whatever the reason, he's got nerve to try something like that. He's talking now. I listen, wanting to know what the mutt has to say for himself.

"I don't see why you're getting so steamed about it. You weren't here. As far as she knows, _you_ don't even care any more. She knows I'll take care of her."

Edward snarls. I'm panicking again. They're going to fight, I can feel it. One of them will get hurt, most likely Jake, and it will be all my fault, and I can't do anything to stop it. I curse whatever it is that holds me trapped in my head. _Let me out! _I scream, but no sound comes out. Nothing happens.

"Think you can take me, bloodsucker?" Jacob taunts him. "Think you got what it takes?"  
"I have killed more than a hundred people, mongrel, many more than you have. I could kill you before you had the chance to realise that was my intention. Please don't tempt me. I have a feeling Bella would never forgive me if her 'best friend' were to die at my hand." Edward's voice is low and menacing, still tinged with a light growl.,

Jake laughs. "Bring it, leech."

More growling, both of them now. I can almost see Jacob shuddering, preparing to phase. Would they really fight in the middle of the hospital? I know the answer already; yes, yes they would.

"Stop it!" Alice's voice suddenly shouts. She must have just come in. "You're both being absurd. Fighting isn't going to help Bella, or anyone else for that matter. So how about we all calm down and talk about this like rational people, hmm?"

"He kissed her Alice." Edward growls.

"And did anything happen? No. He tried, he failed. Now stop being silly."

Thank you God, for putting Alice on this Earth. She has successfully diffused what could have been a violent, vicious, and potentially deadly conflict that could have exposed both the Cullens and the wolves, based on the testosterone fuelled squabbling of a pair of teenagers. She will forever have my gratitude.

"I'm out of here," Jacob says, "Have fun talking to a corpse. If she won't wake up for us, I doubt there's anything that can fix her."

The door slams. I feel like crying, because Jake has given up. He doesn't believe I'm coming back. Well, let him mope. I don't care. I _will _come back. I _will _wake up.

As soon as I figure out how.


	7. Chapter 6: Wishes

(Bella POV)

**T**here isn't much left for me to think about but, still, in some part of my subconscious. I know there is something to contemplate. A spark of distant memories, buried away in here, waiting for their rediscovery. **I**'m growing weaker; my energy is dissolving into the tubes and being flushed from my system. **M**illions of those important seconds, slipping away with each breath. **E**ven he has no hope, not an inkling of optimistic longing. Ithought – it's incredibly naïve, I know – that if _anyone _would have some faith in me, it would be him. I feel so stupid now; of course I know it's too much to ask, considering the state I'm in. You can't ask someone to trust you, trust your judgement, when it has been so wrong in the past.

I'm almost glad that the **u**navoidable decision will be made without my input because they know what's best for me, even if I don't even know it myself any more. Peacefully fading away from the world into the darkness seems better than facing the reality of my seemingly **p**athetic life as it flashes before my eyes in a cliché of impending doom.

_As if I need reminding._

(Edward POV)

"I wish I could stay, but then, I wish for much impossibility in this life. A life I share with you, my love. And, I so dearly want to keep it that way - as much as your charts protest."

I pause to stroke her cold cheek, but fear overrides this action, as the pulsating blood winds through the veins protruding from her neck and I quiver, my throat blazing.

I frantically gasp, and freeze as familiar footsteps prance through room accompanied with an assortment of irritatingly cheerful thoughts. She sees my unmoving figure and tuts disapprovingly as I sink back into the plastic chair.

"Edward." She chirps, gazing at me with disappointment.

I look at the scuffed floor. She knows I can't waste time; she knew this was the final goodbye before I leave.She sighs.

_When was your last meal?_ Her thoughts flicker as she searches through.

"Leave it Alice." I say.

It was no use; she persists and finds the day exactly, sighing again. There is an unfamiliar silence and Alice staggers onto the bed as I grasp her arm, diverting her before she falls onto Bella.

"What? What have you seen?" I demand, but see her eyes are blank and steady her until she blinks repeatedly. She gulps her mind rapidly flicking through a series of images too fast to focus on, before straightening up.

"You need to drink, Edward." She says sternly, shaking my hold of her arm

"I know, but I," I say, she holds her hand to my mouth.

"You need your strength if you are to find her," She states.

"_When_ I find her." I correct and she smiles encouragingly.

"Edward?" She asks expectantly.

She must know that there is no chance I will leave Bella's side to _drink_ when there is a murderous vampire rampaging nearby. Alice clears her throat and I glance at her firm expression – she knows I haven't made the decision to quench my thirst yet, and the anticipation is frustrating her.

_Edward, I am not stupid._

"I know." I smirk. She rolls her eyes.

_I can't wait here forever._

I sigh, defeated. "Fine. I'll drink on the way."

She nods, pleased with the certainty of my statement.

"Remember, Edward, I'll know if you don't."

She smiles angelically and dances from the room. I sometimes wish my sister was not so hard to convince. I hear her drive down the darkening road and I close the pale curtains, hiding the night's shadows from Bella.

"Where was I? Oh yes, I remember now. Your vitals, Miss Swan, need a bit more effort." I chuckle, imagining her protesting in a huff of adorable frustration. "Don't worry, my darling, I'm just joking with you." I say, but feel automatically embarrassed by this statement – she probably can't hear me at all.

I glance cautiously at the pile of funeral care cuttings from Charlie's newspaper with red scrawls, helpfully penned by Renee as they discussed Bella's future. It feels like I am being unfaithful to Bella, just looking at them makes my stomach churn. I should shred them immediately – we won't require any of their services – but some distant part of my conscience stops me. One question hangs despondently in my head as I sprint from the hospital into the night. What if this _is_ the end?

'The course of true love never did run smooth'

A Midsummer Night's Dream

_With her bleeding heart ablaze with the fulfilling promise of demented vengeance the figure tore the plug from the wall with such vigour the socket flickered with electricity. As she dove back through the broken window, throwing the limp body carelessly onto her shoulder, glass shards soared through the violent mist, the entangled debris glistening amongst the fiery mass of crimson locks flying behind her shadowy silhouette. Casting a final malicious glance at the path of devastation behind her, she cackled spitefully and vanished into the threatening shadows._

_As the moonlight slashed grimly into the barren room, wires crackling furiously, coloured tubes leaking fluids onto the bloodstained linen, tattered curtains trembling in the wind through the broken pane… a machine emitting a high pitched tone echoed menacingly into the silent corridor._

(Bella POV)

For once I am glad I'm not 'awake', but the constant threat that I might emerge from this coma at any moment is more terrifying than my earlier worries of dying in my sleep. There are so many unfamiliar noises that startle me every minute, but the worst sound is the most familiar; her voice. She keeps talking to me as though I am her hostage, forced into this constant silence, and I have a strange feeling she has duck-taped my mouth to be sure I am quiet. It is like she knows something I don't, which is even more stressful as I don't even know what she is capable of doing.

I wish Edward had never left so that I would be more prepared for this confrontation with someone as powerful as her. I wish Edward were here, protecting me from her impending torture.

"James was utterly magnificent – far more so than your petty, meaningless, little_,_ _schoolgirl crush. _He would be here if he cared about you, wouldn't he?" She spat.

_You're right, _I feel like crying out. _I'm useless, draining them of all their time._

"But you could never understand the full pain I'm going through, you're just a child. You have no idea how much it hurts every single day, NO IDEA!" She shrieked.

She pacing around me now, smashing anything she can get her hands on. I keep hearing objects soar past my head. If the situation were reversed, knowing my sporting abilities she'd be knocked out again as soon as she awoke.

"_He_ should suffer as much as I have to. And this is where you come in." She hisses, sounding almost gleeful. "You shall die for James. Your precious Edward shall feel what I feel, know my pain for himself. And I shall watch and laugh as he cries over your weak, broken little body, as he mourns the loss of your pitiful life."

_No! Please! I'm begging you!_ I shout, but no sound comes out – disappointing, but it's not like I was expecting anything to happen. It feels like I'll be stuck in this half of the world forever. I lie and wait for her threats to come true.

(Alice POV)

_Six hours earlier._

"He's not going to drink. Honestly, I don't know why I bother." I announce, Jasper smiles and gently kisses my forehead.

"It's because you're so wonderful, my darling." he whispers.

"I wouldn't worry too much, he knows how I hate it when he's snappy and that's only when he misses his meals. He'll be golden before he returns." Esme reassures me. I look at her doubtfully, but Jasper senses my unease, and I suddenly forget about it.

"I can't avoid it, I haven't seen anything yet and it's disconcerting. I need to see something, anything will do, just... something!"

"And you will Alice. But until then, I am going to make you feel better by any means - and you won't be able to stop me," He grins. I sink my head into his shoulder, drawing circles with my fingertips on his collarbone. _I hope everything is okay, Edward._ I think, just in case.

"I had a vision." I say quietly, the room falls silent. Esme looks at me expectantly.

"It was about Edward, but it was difficult to make out – everything was blurring and it faded too fast to be a definite prophecy." I pause as Jasper strokes my head.

"It wasn't obvious what would cause the event, but all I could see was Edward covered in blood." I wait as Carlisle sighs, exchanging a look with Esme.

"What sort of blood are we talking of?" He asks, frowning.

"Human."

"Well, we're lucky he's been warned. Fighting on an empty stomach would be ridiculous, I thought I'd taught him that – It's so unlike him"

"The things we do for love," Esme sighs.

I hold Jasper tightly as they leave the room, after a few moments he turns my head to face his and cups my cheeks in his hands. I roll my eyes.

"Yes, there's more." I say, defeated.

"Alice, why did you think you could fool me?" He smiles briefly.

"It's just, I couldn't see something…" I drift off. He looks at me curiously.

I shrug out of his grasp and walk to look out of the window as he follows.

"You don't usually see the whole event, my love." He whispers in my ear and wraps his arms around my waist. _You don't understand_ I feel like saying.

"Alice?" He asks.

"I didn't see his eyes –I'm sure it's nothing, but,"

"It _will_ be nothing, don't worry yourself." He comforts.

"But what if, if it _is_ important. I have no idea what colour his irises were," I sigh, suddenly feeling a sense of calm and serenity wash through me. "_Jasper_! I'm serious, what if he wasn't hungry?" I cross my arms, stepping away from him, but he twirls me around so our noses almost touch and I can't help but stare at his adorable puppy-dog eyes. "Fine, you're right. I give in." I say, falling onto his lips. _I can be so easily distracted,_ I think, _but who wouldn't with him wrapped around you!_ I grin to myself.

(Victoria POV)

I should take her back; I'm not a psychopath – what was I even thinking? But I remember and thousands of jagged icicles plummet straight through my heart and I keel over, clutching my chest. With his magnificent crooked smile, dazzling skin, glorious laughter singing with mine, muscular arms encasing me in his perfection. Those adorable ears – oh, how he hated their tiny size – unnoticed when surrounded by his heavenly flowing locks. Like any other male, longing for things he could not have, he followed me for weeks trying to get me to go on our first date. I refused, but he kept persisting and pleading me until I could not resist. He was so determined, never giving up! Oh, how I hoped I could withstand his charming behaviour, so gracious and polite, but there was a pull, too magnetic about him. My friends warned me – 'he's trouble' they 'd say, but this danger made him more alluring. I wanted to reform him; influenced by fairytale endings and the feminine desire that with the right love and care you can change any man. They told me to stay away, but forbidden events enticed me even more.When my clan found out, they told me to leave him 'forget about him, he's not good for you' they said. But how could I forget? They made us move around, but each time he followed, begging and pleading. I wanted his affections so much; I wanted to feel adored, needed. We had an eternity ahead of us, young lovers, so we ran away together. I left my life behind, safe and secure, for the freedom of travelling.

When I admitted that his affections were mutual, he changed completely. He had claimed his _prize_.

I was discarded, like a child leaving the toy they'd played with for years to gather dust on the shelf. All of our passion, his attention and adoration… vanished.

_Why didn't I leave him?_ They wondered. I wish I had the strength. I watched him invite the affections of hundreds of beautiful girls, seemingly oblivious of our relationship. I felt so helpless, so _human. _They say it takes absence to appreciate presence, well, in his death; I lost half of my life. Our memories. _Why didn't I leave him?_

It took his loss, to finally realize why I put up with so much more than anyone would have, why I watched him break the hearts of countless people, why I left my life behind to follow him.

_Love_.


	8. Chapter 7: Showdown

Chapter 7: Showdown

**EPOV**

I know Alice is going to kill me, but I can't help it. I've been on this quest – a quest to remove Victoria from this earth, thereby making Bella safe forever – for months now, and when I saw in Jacob's mind that she had been _here_... I can't not try and track her down.

Looks like I'm going to get lucky too. There's a strong trail leading into the mountains, and even an inexperienced tracker like me can tell that it's fresh; she came this way no more than a few hours ago. I follow it, racing as fast as I can to catch her.

Five minutes in, and something isn't quite right. There is a distinctly human scent alongside Victoria's. I think I even see a few spots of blood every so often. Why would she carry a kill, bleeding, all the way out here? Unless she's trying to turn someone. But... no... it can't be... it can't.

It is.

I don't know why I didn't recognise it before. The scent, so tempting, so strong, it burns my throat like nothing else, making me suddenly hyper aware of how thirsty I am.

Bella. She has Bella. Oh God, no, no, please no. She'll die; without her life support... she could be dead already. No, no, she can't she can't.

I find a burst of speed I didn't know was possible. I stop only to take down a deer that happens to cross my path, and then only for a few minutes, only so I have enough strength. Then I am flying again, tearing through the trees faster than ever before, not caring that I'm probably knocking over a few of them, not caring that there are probably twigs and leaves in my hair and dirt on my clothes. Not caring about anything but finding her, saving her, reaching her before it is too late and I lose her forever.

Frustration builds within me, more and more every second, compounding itself and combining with something very similar to adrenaline, until I am consumed by complete and utter fury. How dare she! How dare that low-life, disgusting, monstrous... I can't even call her a woman. She is the most sorry excuse for a female that I have ever known. To attack an innocent, injured, defenceless girl, to wilfully risk ending her life to avenge the death of a creature as deplorable as herself. I will take great satisfaction from ending her, I know it. If she has hurt my Bella, I won't be responsible for my actions.

The mountains loom over me and I speed up again. I don't know how I can go any faster; it can't be physically possible. But then there is the scent, stronger now as I get closer, and more blood on the trail. Soon, soon. They're close, I know it. Please, God please, let Bella be okay. Don't take my last reason to exist away from me. I need her and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I am selfish to feel that way, but I don't care. She is all I live for. Please, please, please...

At last, I see an opening in the rock face ahead of me; a small cave, about seven feet high and ten or so wide. I can just see the back of it, too far to judge the distance but not far enough to be out of sight. Of course, that means I see the figure who stands inside, and the slumped shape on the floor. I see the flash of red hair in a chance ray of sun. I smell the rich, tangy, burning scent of fresh blood and open wounds.

I growl, low in my throat, then fury takes over and I roar, so loud it shakes the trees and bounces off the rocks.

"VICTORIA!"

Her head whips around, fiery hair flying, and answers me with a ferocious snarl. She is as angry at me for finding her as I am at her for what she's doing. Just as I reach the cave, she comes flying out of it, teeth snapping and hands curled into claws. We collide with a loud BOOM, and we don't even wait until we hit the ground before we are up and fighting. Again and again, she swipes at me, trying to get at my neck, growling and snarling, her face so twisted it is barely human any more. I know I must look the same, but I honestly don't care. I have to win, I have to destroy her, so I can get to Bella.

Bella Bella Bella Bella...

I can't even allow myself to listen for her heartbeat; I have to focus on the she-devil who refuses to be defeated or ignored. We twist and turn, her movements coming to me a second before she makes them, mine anticipated by her just as quickly. We are almost evenly matched. Almost. But she is thirsty, and I am not. Bella's scent fills the air as her blood drips onto the rock, and it is distracting Victoria. Every few seconds, her head turns slightly towards the source of the glorious scent; she cannot resist it, but I can. I have lived with that smell for so long, I barely even register it.

There is a moment; she is more distracted than ever before, turning almost completely away from me, forgetting me entirely for a split second. It's all I need to dart in and enclose her in my arms tightly, my mouth at her throat. She stiffens and hisses.

"You're too late!" she growls, her already shrill voice even more grating. "You're too late to save her!"

"Go to hell." I snarl in her ear, and rip her head from her shoulders with my teeth.

I spend the next minute taking my frustrations out on her body. By the time I am done, the pile of stony flesh is not even recognisable as a person any more. I pull out the lighter I stowed in my pocket before I left, flicking it on and throwing it into the mound. The flame catches immediately, and the foul smelling smoke begins to rise into the evening sky.

I turn away from the funeral pyre and enter the cave. Bella's broken body lies in a corner, surrounded by shards of rock – the remains of a small boulder by the entrance. Some have cut her; her face and arms are covered in little red scratches. The IV is still poking out of the back of her hand, and various sensors, their wires trailing in the dirt, are still attached to her, but the breathing tube the doctors put on her before I arrived is gone. Her mouth and eyes are closed, and she looks as peaceful and beautiful as ever.

There is no sound. Not even my breathing breaks the silence that has fallen. It is as if all the world has ceased its racket in this one moment; humans, animals, vampires, werewolves, and all the other creatures of this earth, all silent in tribute to this wonderful girl.

Because Victoria was right. I am too late. Bella's heart has stopped and she is dead.

She is dead.

I break down. My knees buckle and I collapse to the floor. Sobs rip through me, puncturing the stillness as I crawl across the cave floor to her side, as I reach out and gently remove the little wires from her forehead, as I carefully work the needle out of her hand. Agonising grief, unlike any I have ever experienced, wraps itself around my heart and squeezes, crushing every hope and desire and happiness I have ever had. My sobs become full blown howls of pain as I stare at her still form; her face looks as if she is merely sleeping, that same dead sleep that has gripped her for so many weeks.

But now, the death is real. There is no slight rise and fall of her chest, no strong, comforting heartbeat, reassuring me despite my misgivings. I will never see those sparkling brown eyes, never hear her sigh my name, never watch her bite her lip in that way that always made me want to kiss her so badly.

The noise I am making is bouncing around the cave and the rocks outside, loud enough to deafen even me. I don't care. I cry and cry, half-screaming her name over and over, though I can no longer think it – it hurts too much.

I don't realise I have company until I feel a hand on my shoulder. I look up; it is Carlisle. He is looking down at me with pity in his eyes, the same look he gave me almost 90 years ago when he told me my mother was dead. I glance over my shoulder; the rest of my family is standing in the opening to the cave. Alice and Esme seem on the edge of tears; Emmett's usual smile is absent; Jasper's face is twisted as he absorbs all the pain around him; even Rosalie looks upset. I realise suddenly that I hear heartbeats; Renee and Charlie stand beside Rosalie, holding hands and staring at their daughter. I don't care how they got here, or that the fact they _are_ here means they must know our secret. I simply don't care about anything any more.

"Edward," Carlisle murmurs gently. _Son, we need to move her._

"NO!" I shout, making the humans jump. I turn back to my darling and bury my face in her chest, covering her with my body."Don't touch her!"

Renee is crying; I can hear her quiet sobs. Her mind is full of sadness and grief. She cries for the loss of her child, and she cries for me.

_Just look at him... he loves her so much. I thought he looked broken at the hospital but now..._

I cannot listen. Her pity is too much for me to handle. I block them all out, focusing on the angel in my arms, looking at her still, perfect features. She really is an angel now. In the hands of God, where I can never follow.

"One last kiss my love," I whisper, too quiet for anyone to hear, except perhaps Carlisle. "One last kiss before we say goodbye."

And I press my lips to hers as gently as I always have since the very first time, on that sunny Saturday when I first showed her the meadow; our meadow. Only now, she doesn't respond. She doesn't fly at me with a fervour that nearly shatters my control. She doesn't wrap her arms around me and hug me, as if she could hold me to her forever. She stays absolutely still.

My lips leave hers after a moment; I kiss her no longer than I would normally, breaking away before she runs out of air. But she isn't breathing now, so I don't know why I bother. Just remembering that she is well and truly gone has me breaking down again, sobbing uncontrollably into the hideous hospital gown that is the only thing covering her fragile body. Voices surround me; hands touch me; minds try to invade my own. I ignore it all. The world no longer has any importance for me.

_Thump._

I freeze. The cooler hands on me do too, and all the sounds stop. A gruff voice – Charlie – asks what is wrong. Someone shushes him.

_Thump._

Again. That noise... so familiar... so close.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

_Thump thump thump thump thump..._

A heartbeat. A heartbeat. Impossible, yet it is true. I know its sound; I would know it anywhere, could pick it out from a crowd of hundreds, hear it from miles away.

Miraculously, impossibly, denying all logic and reason, Bella's heart is beating.

"What is it?" Renee asks as I raise my head to stare at my beloved's still frozen face.

"Her heart," Carlisle sounds perplexed. "It's beating. But I'm sure... it wasn't when we arrived."

"You hear it too?" Alice chimes in, her voice shaking. "I'm not imagining it?"

"You're not," I whisper, "Unless I am too. Unless we all are."

Suddenly, Bella's lips part. She sucks in a deep breath and lets it out, then another, and another, until she is breathing normally. She still hasn't moved, and she still appears to be sleeping, but her heart and her breaths sound so much stronger, more healthy than they did in the hospital.

I lean over, taking her face in my hands. "Bella? Love, can you hear me?"

Her ivory forehead puckers, the little crinkle between her eyebrows that always appears when she is worried forming itself. She scrunches up her eyes, before her lids flutter briefly and slowly open. Several people gasp in astonishment; I may be one of them.

Bella stares at me, the wide chocolate-coloured eyes I have missed so much alight with wonder. We gaze into each others eyes for a moment. Then her frown vanishes and she smiles, a big, real smile that lights up her whole face.

"Edward," she whispers, and the sound of her voice saying my name as I have dreamt of for so many months is like a chorus of angels. "You're here. You saved me."

"Bella," I choke, "Oh Bella!"

I wrap my arms around her, crushing her to my chest while being careful not to hurt her. Her arms, shaking slightly, enclose me in return, and she rubs her hands up and down my back soothingly.

"I thought I'd lost you." I sob, my face pressed into her hair.

"So did I." she whispers, and I can hear the fear in her tone. "But it's okay, I'm okay now. We're together, and everything will be alright as long as that is true." She is reassuring me; for once, I am weak and she is strong.

I pull back to look her in the eyes.

"I love you." I say, hoping she will see the sincerity in my eyes, hoping she will read the things I cannot say aloud. _I'm sorry, forgive me, love me still, despite everything I've done to you._

Bella smiles softly, adoringly. "I love you too." Her voice is still soft, weak after so long without use, but it is impossible to doubt her honesty.

She takes my face in her hands and pulls me down for another kiss, and I am home.


	9. Chapter 8: Obituary

Chapter 9: Obituary

Jacob POV

_In desperation we do strange things, Bells. You just don't stop to think about them before you're doing something insane without reason._

_It was so hard Bella, for all of us. Fake-smiles and flowers were all that stopped us from trying to think about, let alone answer, that nagging word that silenced the room._

_You go into this state of ignorance for the world around you. Time doesn't matter anymore. Days blur into weeks, clocks have no purpose – the rules of night and day don't apply to you anymore. I found myself fighting with the nurses as they told me to leave, my friends tried to drag me out in the night as I listened to your soothing heart monitor – the rhythmic buzzing became my favourite song, a lullaby that reminded me you were still in there. You were still _alive_. It got to the stage where I was sat opposite _him_. You're probably happy at that I guess. Your internal melody kept us from __fighting__ talking – both joined by the shared faith in your survival and infuriated when that beautiful silence was interrupted._

Anyway, there's something I've been meaning to tell you, and I'd rather you hear it from me first. Here it goes. I kissed you when you were in your coma, on the lips. I wish I could say that I had dreamed of your fairytale awakening, Bells, but the truth is a lot more twisted than that. They were out hunting; I was alone, with you… looking so radiant. The partitions between the room were closed; the curtains open to let the sunlight stream onto your porcelain skin. It sprung out of nowhere, I swear! I know you'll hate me; I'm an idiot and a creep. I shouldn't have even considered it, trust me Bells – I wasn't in my right mind, I wasn't myself! The Docs were giving up hope, it was months Bella, they didn't think you'd make it; they said… they said we should consider 'letting you go'. Never! I would never, Bella, I wouldn't even consider it! I will never give up hope on you. You've got to believe me, I wasn't thinking straight. They said you should die 'peacefully', I guess the blood-suckers decided to clear their heads and ran away, but I faced it Bella, I stayed with you as they left you. Alone. I would've done anything. Just to know that there was something there, that you were inside, hearing my screams.

What had I been dreaming about? - You're probably wondering. There's a reason I kept this to the end, Bells, because it has been haunting me since the day you fell and up until now it's been incomplete, but now that missing detail that I needed to finish it was found.

I planned it – my death – vowed that if you didn't wake up, if that monitor skipped one small beat, then I was going with you. I will always follow you Bells, into the darkness. I stayed as close as they would let me, making sure that you were still there, counting each precious tone in my head. It would be the same way you went: I would go to the cliffs we had been at so many months ago. I was going to take some peonies, white ones – your favourites, aren't they? I would put them there with my note, so everybody knew it was not an accident, but a declaration of my undying love for you, Bella. A purposeful; meaningful act of sheer courage that was never to be mistaken for a drunken leap or idiotic dare that a childish teenager would do. I would slot the note in the flowers and tie it with some black ribbon – embroidered with gold thread to bind the words onto the silk fabric forever. "Sleep tight, princess." Then I would jump, near the rocks, the day after your funeral. It wouldn't hurt, Bells, because I'd know I would be with you soon. Hear your laughter again, like the soft chime of bells. See you smile, just one more time.

You know in some cultures, taking a picture of someone is as personal as cutting off some of their hair, because it is like capturing a piece of their soul. I don't want to just have the memories, there is no soul in the newer pictures I have of you. You don't smile with your eyes, I can tell. Because when you really smile it melts my heart and the heat flashes through my body like a firework. I just want to see you smile, Bells. Just to show me this was an accident, not an escape-route – I know you're smart, Bella, but you wouldn't. Would you? It makes me wonder if I really know you at all.

I know I've been looking for too many 'signs' over the past few weeks, spent hours asking you to move a finger, flutter an eyelash, anything just to reaffirm my faith, reassure me that this is worth it. But I'm serious here; Bells… just, just pull through this. Wake up. I guess it makes no difference to me though; I'll be with you wherever you are. Whenever you need me, I'll be there. I know, I know, you probably don't feel the same about me yet, but I can deal with that. Just as long as you're safe, Bells. Happy.

Sweet Dreams,

Jacob

I watch as the water swallows the final word and the waves drag the sodden rag into the darkness. Nobody has to know about this. I don't know why I even decided to write it. It seems so pathetic and weak. At least she'll never have to see it, feel the lies sink into her cold skin. I got sucked into that black hole of remorse, just begging for her sympathy. The biggest lie, the most difficult to write is by far the worst. She'll never be happy, so long as he is here. And I will never be able to deal with that.

**Bella POV**

It was like a deeply rehearsed play. Carlisle shot them with rubber bullets in the forest near their house, to knock them out. Alice and I had some fun arranging them on the sofas with strewn blankets and half-empty coffee mugs, the dregs swirling at the bottom. Edward said I should lie down, get some rest, build up my strength – but I didn't want to waste any second they were with me. We continued with our life-size doll house game and added an open packet of biscuits, sprinkling some crumbs over the floor, much to Esme's dismay, and set up a horror movie to play the credits as they were waking up. I put a magazine on the couch next to Renee and her phone in her hand. It was all rather convincing until we had to devise the reason they were at the Cullen's recently refurbished house as far away from the hospital as it could get.

'Ooh, I know, we could bring some equipment to the cliff,' Alice said, enthusiastically, turning to Carlisle in need of approval.

Edward rolled his eyes and her voice became background noise as I stared into the amber jewels, our gazes locked instantly, the room becoming a hazy blur. Alice had been coming up with many extreme ideas and everyone was starting to lose patience, but it seemed that this one had caught Carlisle's attention.

'Well, if we just move this here, we could bring some equipment back, then set it up over there,' He walked from the room, Alice in tow, pointing widely with his arms.

I looked to Edward and he shook his head indulgently.

'We'll leave this up to them, just make sure you don't laugh during our little performance' He smiled, and I felt my heart thud slowly into my ribcage like a hammer on a over-filled pillow, quickly remembering to return his smile.

It had been so long, so long since I'd seen him, touched him, felt his marble torso as we clung together.

Only a few hours ago I was blasted into thick, blinding darkness, suffocating in this heavy fog that was pushing on every cell in my body and being swallowed into the damp core of this strange being, nothingness, hacking at every part of me.

And in the deafening silence something grabbed me.

Then I was choking, it felt like I would explode, a balloon fit to burst and was still being pumped with astonishing light and forced down my throat with no space for it, but it was a magnificent feeling, thousands of blinding butterflies floating through my bones and caressing each inch of me until I was luminous and the butterflies dissolved until I feel a razor slide into my lungs. Then another, and I realise it is air. So I intake all I can, the familiar thump of my heart charging up, ready for the finale. My eyes flickered and I saw a bizarre pink glow penetrating through the darkness. My eyelids! So I concentrate, feeling the cool breeze brush onto my cheeks like stone, willing with all of the trapped energy inside of me that had been dormant for so long…

And then they were open. And he was there.

And all was right with the world.


	10. Epilogue: Life Goes On

Epilogue: Life Goes On

**EPOV**

The dull light of another grey Forks morning brakes through the curtains and washes across Bella's sleeping face, making her alabaster skin glow and her mahogany hair shine. How it is possible for her to get more beautiful I don't know, but ever since she awakened she has seemed even more radiant to me than before. Perhaps the long separation and the threat of losing her is making me appreciate her more. And I do appreciate her; I treasure every day we share, knowing that any one could be her last. Or not, as the case may be.

Bella did not hesitate to argue her point visa vie her transformation, bringing it up the first time we were all gathered together without any other humans around. The ensuing 'discussion' ended in a vote, with each of us saying whether we wanted her to change or not. Only Rosalie sided with me, and it was decided that Carlisle would do the honours when Bella pretended to go off to college. Luckily, because of all the school she missed, Bella had to take summer school in order to graduate, and I was able to talk her into taking a year off – which gives me an extra year to give her all the human experiences I can.

She does deserve the relaxation time. While Alice went back to school after our return, I did not, choosing to spend my days at Bella's side while she slept. This had the unexpected benefit of meaning we were both in the same boat when it came to our schooling – sort of – and I was able to spend the whole summer with her at school, encouraging and tutoring her whenever she would let me. Of course, she passed all her finals with flying colours, even the dreaded Calculus.

My love does not stir as I watch her peaceful slumber; so much better than the dead sleep of her coma. She does not react when Charlie gets up to go to work, clomping around loudly in his heavy boots, and she sleeps through the cruiser pulling out of the drive.

Another potential problem that turned out better than expected; Charlie and Renee easily accepted our story explaining their 'dreams' about us being vampires, believing that they had simply fallen asleep in front of an old Dracula movie, and the content of the film had influenced their subconscious. Renee spent a few more weeks here with Bella, then returned to Florida, content with the knowledge that her daughter was safe and happy. I found Renee's mind intriguing to listen to when not enmeshed in grief. Her childlike point of view and easy distraction definitely worked in our favour.

Charlie is slightly more cynical, and I see him giving me suspicious looks every so often, but he never says anything, and he too seems content as long as Bella is happy. He can't argue that her state of mind now isn't a thousand times better than it was.

I reach out and gently brush my fingertips across Bella's cheek. She sighs and her eyelids flicker. I can't deny the profound sense of relief I get every time she opens her eyes in the morning, even after all this time.

"Hey," she mumbles, smiling at me sleepily.

"Good morning," I smile. "Happy birthday."

She groans, and I can't help chuckling a little. She pouts, looking utterly adorable, and says, "Can't we just forget my birthday? It never seems to go well."

I try not to frown and succeed... just. "Don't you worry Bella. Alice learned her lesson; no party, no attention. I couldn't stop everyone buying presents of course, but I have their solemn promise not to interfere. Today is all about you and me, sharing some much needed quality time." I kiss her forehead, right where it puckers into a frown. "Nothing to worry about. I'll protect you from the big bad monster, I promise." My tone is teasing, but the promise is very real. I will protect her from everything, be it my brother, Victoria, or the Volturi – who, in the biggest stroke of luck in history, still haven't learned of her existence.

Bella purses her lips, eyeing me speculatively. "Just you and me?"

I nod.

"And we can do whatever I want?"  
"Anything, love."

She seems to think about that for a moment, then breaks into a wide smile. "Well, how about we start with you giving me a proper kiss." she teases, wrapping one arm around my waist and drawing herself closer.

"As you wish, my lady," I chuckle, and lean in to press my lips to hers. I kiss her firmly, with just enough pressure, parting my lips so that I am breathing into her mouth. She sighs happily and presses forward, eager to get more out of me. For once, I let her, unwilling to deny her anything today. I roll onto my back and she leans over me, never breaking our kiss as I cup her face between my hands. Her hands rest on my chest and the warmth of her soaks through my shirt into the very core of my being. I love it, and I can't get enough.

We kiss for a long time, longer than we ever have before. Every so often I pull away and kiss down the column of her throat so that she can breath, but Bella is quick to pull me back to her lips, never letting me stray far. When her stomach rumbles, we both laugh, and she finally gets up, climbing out of the bed and extending her hand towards me. I take it, though I don't need her help getting up, and we walk together downstairs to the kitchen.

I watch her again as she eats her breakfast and chatters happily about all the nonsensical goings on of our former classmates. She knows that I already know everything she says, and more, but her voice comforts me; it reminds me that she is still here, along with her scent and her heartbeat and the emotions held in the unfathomable depths of her milk chocolate eyes and the feel of her warm hand in mine. She knows all of this too, knows how much I need reassuring. She has become the strong one out of the two of us, the one to hold me up when no one else can. The fact that she does this naturally and happily makes me love her even more, reaffirms for me the certainty that we are meant for each other.

There will be difficulties ahead, I am sure. We will have more than our fair share of fights and arguments, like any couple. But I know that as long as we have each other, everything will work out in the end.

Because I can't imagine living without her.


End file.
